I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
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