sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
