I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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