this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
