I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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