I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
It's blow job season.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize