Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
