I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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