He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
