So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
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i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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