Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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