do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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