still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
