Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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