I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
