I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
