To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
high people should be assigned attendants
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
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