Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
