Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Randomize
