Texts From Last Night

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  (585): View more from New York

  My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.

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  (585): My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon. http://tfl.nu/q628
  Replies (8) Good night (3754) Bad night (1030)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am

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  (224): I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am http://tfl.nu/o84u
  Replies (4) Good night (5064) Bad night (1201)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.

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  (617): I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny. http://tfl.nu/fr7i
  Replies (10) Good night (1129) Bad night (2417)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.

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  (704): Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time. http://tfl.nu/8mlt
  Replies (6) Good night (3159) Bad night (1279)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk

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  (561): Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk http://tfl.nu/69zw
  Replies (2) Good night (1870) Bad night (1306)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.

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  (313): I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents. http://tfl.nu/eaix
  Replies (6) Good night (3225) Bad night (1019)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?

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  (970): Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer? http://tfl.nu/hh36
  Replies (3) Good night (2403) Bad night (629)
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  (914): View more from New York

  I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken

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  (914): I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken http://tfl.nu/q5lf
  Replies (5) Good night (854) Bad night (1048)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?

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  (402): Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out? http://tfl.nu/j98q
  Replies (14) Good night (657) Bad night (3008)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.

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  (859): I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now. http://tfl.nu/jyw8
  Replies (5) Good night (1157) Bad night (567)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  We're showing the video later bring pizza

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  (919): i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF (1-919): We're showing the video later bring pizza http://tfl.nu/1zdw
  Replies (2) Good night (880) Bad night (310)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.

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  (305): Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning. http://tfl.nu/6foo
  Replies (0) Good night (635) Bad night (334)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat

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  (425): Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat http://tfl.nu/7oyq
  Replies (0) Good night (309) Bad night (525)
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  (530): View more from California

  It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.

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  (530): It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite. http://tfl.nu/ndu2
  Replies (10) Good night (381) Bad night (1084)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.

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  (317): So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day. http://tfl.nu/ljj0
  Replies (3) Good night (284) Bad night (550)

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