i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
