is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
