her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Randomize
