mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
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