in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
