Swine flu. Run for my life!
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
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