high people should be assigned attendants
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
