someone threw a dead crab at me
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
