i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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