susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
