never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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