i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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