too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Randomize
