It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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