he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
