i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize
