just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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