Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't put those talents on a resume
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
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