apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
