Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here