he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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