we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
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