Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
