help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
