U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
