What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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