She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
