so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
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you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
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You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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