evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
