I'm drive I can fine osifer
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Barsexuality is the new black.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Randomize
