it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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